Online Dating Etiquette

After years of experience dealing with cheesy chat up lines, rejection and down-right crazy girlfriends / boyfriends, many of us are pretty clued up in the realms of dating. We know the etiquette, we’ve mastered the text & response time span, we’re equipped to the methods of ‘phasing out’ an undesirable date, and we know how to say ‘no’ when approached at a bar. These lessons have been learnt from centuries of dating traditions handed down from one little black book to another.
Online dating however, is a whole new kettle of fish. And we’re all in it together when it comes to working out the do’s and don’ts. Through our experience we’ve learnt a few lessons that we’d now like to pass down to you…

What to say in the first message…

There are thousands of people online. Sending a generic ‘hey beautiful’ or ‘wanna chat?’ basically means ‘This is a blanket message that I send to everyone, I haven’t read nor am I interested in, your profile.’

So what do you do instead? You have one chance to catch this person’s attention, so make an effort. Read their profile and comment on something they’ve said, showing that you have a genuine interest. Like, ‘Is one of your photos taken in Thailand? I went there a couple of years ago,’ or ‘So you like to read? Me too! I’m currently reading….’

*A handy little tip* Include a key word in your profile. At the end of your About Me section, tell the reader that if he/she wants to message you please include the word <insert>. That way you know if they’ve actually read your whole profile!

Not interested?

Someone’s messaged you and you’re not interested. Do you reply? We’d say that there are 2 basic rules to stick to in this tricky situation:

1)      If the email was generic; ‘What’s up?’, ‘How’s it going,’ ‘You have a lovely smile!’, then ignore it. The sender hasn’t put his/her heart and soul into it so you don’t need to respond.

2)      If however, they’ve clearly read your profile and have written a nice long message touching upon your interests and asking questions, then the polite thing to do is to respond. Obviously don’t list the reasons why you’re not interested, because no one wants that! Just try a general, ‘Sorry but you’re a little too far away!’ of ‘thank you for getting in touch, but you’re a little out of my age range’…..

Is it ok to date more than one match?

So you’ve planned a date with a match, but another eligible guy or girl has asked you out too. Is it ok to date more than one person? Absolutely! Online dating is about meeting new people, exploring your options and having fun; by doing these 3 things the theory is that you’ll end up with one great person who is perfect for you. It’s an unwritten rule that you’re allowed to talk to as many people as you like, and there is no reason why you shouldn’t meet each of these potential suitors for a date.

If things are going well with one particular person then you probably won’t want to date anyone else. So just trust your instincts on this one and do what feels right.

 

When should you remove your profile?

You’ve been on a few dates and things are going so well that last night he went in for the hand-hold. What does this mean?? Is it time to remove your dating profile and send out your ‘Save the Dates’? Maybe hold back on the latter, but it may be time to discuss the whole dating profile thing. Remember, you both met online so you're both in the same predicament.

It’s not a necessity to sit down and talk formerly about the issue; if you don’t want to date or talk to anyone else online, then remove your profile. If you’re both into each other, then the likelihood is your new ‘sort-of partner / person you’re seeing’ is going to do the same thing. Just wait until it comes up naturally.

And if further down the line you discover that he or she Is married / is bonkers, or it’s just not working out, then you can re-activate your profile and get back in the dating game.

We’ve just touched upon a few of the FAQ’s of online dating today – so keep your eyes peeled for more blog entries discussing the do’s and don’ts of finding love online.

Thinking about Online Dating? Try out Flirtify today; it's free to join!